The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
