I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
