I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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