Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
