HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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