Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
do herpes really smell.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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