32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Sex in the backyard? Check.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
