I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
