so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
