We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
