don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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