I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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