So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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