So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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