I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
