dude i'm inner monologue high
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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