Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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