he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize