Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
