so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I got her a Nickelback box set.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize