I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize