HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
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