would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
