All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
There r osticjed everywhere
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
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