Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
We talked him into tasing himself.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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