our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
