on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
