I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
