You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize