tell your sister to shave her snatch
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize