Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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