with your own penis?
Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
