is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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