how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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