they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
