I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
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