she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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