Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize