my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
