She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
