woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
