I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
