Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
