i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize