would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize