Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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