jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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