Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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