i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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