i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
