the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
