wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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